I Can't Blog: F•R•I•E•N•D•S

We're gonna start this shen-dig off with this:

"Make as many friends as you can, but don’t build your life on them alone. It’s an unstable foundation." - Sean Covey

There were a few friendships that I had that I built my life on. I didn't know it at the time, but it's become clear to me after the friendships have ended, how much I truly depended on them. I went to them for approval and my confidence depended on how they viewed me. They probably didn't know it, actually, I'm almost positive that they didn't know just how much I relied on them. To make a long story short, one of the friends was a guy I dated and the other was a woman who was like a mentor to me for years and someone I could always go to for advice. They ended up dating, I'm left on the side hated by both because of rumors going around saying that I was talking bad about them. The reason I tell this story isn't to put them on blast, they aren't going to read this, not many people even know who they are. I say this because people aren't perfect and they make mistakes and they yell at you. The good thing about all this is that there is one who is perfect and will never make a mistake and will never leave you and will always be there for you no matter what has happened.

Jesus.

Isaiah 41:10 says: "feat not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Is that not comforting? In times when you feel broken down, when things just aren't going how you want them, when you feel like you just can't go on anymore. "I will strengthen you, I will help you". Having my best friend and the girl who I went to for everything tell me they don't want to be a friend to me at all anymore for dumb rumors that were spread, that hit pretty hard. Not gonna lie, I spent countless nights crying, unsure of why this would happen, confused on if I even wanted them in my life at all anymore, I was a wreck. Thankfully, I go to this amazing school that assigns books for us to read over break. The book that I was assigned to read (along with the other students going to fiji) is one called Jesus + Nothing = Everything by Tullian Tchividjian. It's a great book and I highly recommend it. Anyway, while reading it, a certain quote jumped out at me and slapped me in the face.

“Your pain could be God prying open your life and heart to remove a gift of His that you've been holding on to more dearly than Him.” - Jesus + Nothing = Everything

It hit me. It was absolutely right. I had been holding onto those friends, the guy in particular, and shoving God way way down below him. My priorities were wack, my judgment clouded, these friendships weren't healthy or fruitful. So, how can I be mad about what happened when what it really was was God taking that temptation out of my life so that I could focus more on Him?

After everything that happened I still had about 2 weeks left of break. I started working back at the original Chick-Fil-A store that I started out at, and it opened up opportunity for me to get back friendships I had with friends there. Working at this other Chick-Fil-A is actually the best thing that happened to me over break. I didn't realize how much I loved and missed these group of friends. My break after that was filled with bowling, laser tag, food and campfires where we read stories, told stories and laughed. It was the best 2 weeks I had had in a long time. And even better it took my mind off of what had happened at the beginning of the break.

Proverbs 18:25 comes to mind "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."

These sweet friends I have have stuck closer than a brother. I love them and they're awesome. However, they're not perfect, I'm not perfect, we will mess up, there will continue to be fights. It's something I understand now, though. Friends are great, but Jesus is forever. So I guess you could say my New Years Resolution is to stop putting the weight of Jesus' job on others shoulders when I know they can't hold it.

~Link Life~